Paying the Price

Do you remember a time
Back in our prime,
Back when our hearts were both young.
It was just you and me
Wild and free
Happily focused on just having fun.
But time has a way
Of making us pay
For every roll of the dice.
We bet it all
And our bluff gets called,
And we end up paying the price.

After all the dances
And the chances that we dared
It’s amazing that we’re both still here.
You and me together
Damn the weather, we don’t care.
We could face the devil without fear.

So let the piper play,
We’ll pay him someday,
Let the music go on for a while.
Honey can’t you see
It’s just reality.
We can dance and stroll another mile.
We can face another day,
It all passes anyway,
So cut that cake and have another slice.
Put your worries in the past
Because nothing ever lasts
And we all end up paying the price.

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Backed Up on the Freeway

I left your arms this morning,
Didn’t want to go.
Spent all day at work. Seems like
A million years or more.
Whistle blows and now I’m gone
In a screaming streak of blue,
But now I’m backed up on the freeway
Trying to get back home to you.

Fade left, fade right,
In a sea of red tail lights.
No saving off-ramp can I see,
Just tons of metal blocking me from you.

I call you on the telephone,
“Babe, I’m trying to make it home”.
And you say it’s okay,
You understand.
That’s the time I realize
The love that I find in your eyes,
And I’m so lucky
Just to be your man.

Now what’s that up ahead I see?
That wall of traffic breaking free,
This rolling prison soon may be
An open highway leading me to you.

The minutes seem to pass like days
And my mind is in such a haze,
Only one thought keeps me going
Strong to see it through.
Knowing at my journeys end
I will see your face again,
I won’t be backed up on the freeway
Trying to get back home to you.

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Let’s Get Out of Here

Let’s get out of here.
Let’s go for a walk.
No one else, just you and me,
Someplace where we can talk.
Your head on my shoulder,
I whisper soft in your ear,
Tell you how much I love you
As I’m holding you near.

I know you came here to have a little fun,
To dance a dance or two and maybe meet someone,
But every time I look into your eyes
What I want to say is so clear.
That’s how I know
It’s time to go,
So, Baby, let’s get out of here.

Let’s get out of here.
I know a place we can go
Where the music plays softly
And the lights are low.
I can sing you sweet love songs,
Take away all your fears.
Tell you how much I love you.
Let’s get out of here.

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On the Fourth Floor

Sitting alone in this third floor apartment
As alone as a body can be,
Staring at streetlamps til way after midnight
Starving for your company.
Longing to call, but knowing you’re busy
With your life and your brand new love. You’re up on the fourth floor
While I sit here longing,
With heaven just one floor above.

There was a time when you said you loved me
And promised to always be true,
But I wasn’t ready, the timing seemed wrong, and
I acted just like a fool.
Now that I know the mistake that I made
You’ve had the strength to move on.
You’re up on the fourth floor,
Happy at last,
While I sit here drinking alone.

No one can know how good we might have been
If I had seen Heaven back when.
I can’t help but wonder; would I get it right
If I had the chance to start over again?

I hope you’re happy. Hope that it lasts.
I hope that he’ll always be true.
But if things don’t work out, just call out my name
And I will come running to you.
One floor below you, just biding my time,
Knowing that Heaven’s in view
Up on the fourth floor you smile down at me
And I’m patiently waiting for you.

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Don’t

You say you were tempted
To up and walk away,
Divided by your feelings
And what other people say,
And you wonder,
Oh, is it all worthwhile.

Just keeps getting harder
No matter how you try.
Should you accept excuses?
Believe his alibis?
And you know
What you really want.
He says “I love you so.
Honey please don’t go.”
And you don’t.

How many stories?
How many times have you cried?
No one can blame you,
They see just how hard you’ve tried.

Next time he fills you
With his world of lies,
Tells you he’s sorry,
No matter how hard he tries.
He says he’ll change,
Ah, but you know he won’t.
And as you walk away
He’ll beg you to stay,
And you don’t.

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It’s Possible

It’s possible to put a man on the moon,
Possible that Heaven might be,
It’s possible that there may be life up on Mars,
Possible that you could love me.

Incredible, the look in your eyes,
Excitable, just holding your hand.
Unquenchable, the thirst that I have for your touch.
It’s possible I could be your man.

Every little bit of hope that you give me,
Every little sigh that you show,
Every smile, every mile of your highway
I will walk with you forever,
Wherever you go.

It’s possible to be so in love,
Possible to always be true.
And I know til the end of all time
I’ll still be here loving you.

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Unbreakable

Unbreakable…
Unshakable…
I built a wall right from the very start.
Then came you…
Can’t believe it’s true…
You’ve broken my unbreakable heart.

Siren’s call…
Did not intend to fall…
Just a fool playing out a part.
You forsake…
Left me in your wake…
Breaking my unbreakable heart.

I was so clever
Putting up defenses,
Then you broke down
Every single one.
But instead of staying
Mending all our fences,
You took my heart and
Sailed into the sun.

You’ll regret…
And I’ll forget
All those little things that
Tore our love apart.
Til I do
I’ll keep missing you
While I’m mending my unbreakable heart.

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Two Lips and Tulips

I walk through your field where
The tulips grow wild
And I sway as they wave in the wind.
I think of your sweet lips,
The curve of your smile,
And wonder if I’ll ever see you again.

You were my morning,
As fresh as the dew,
And life was so simple back then.
Your smile was brighter
Than the tulips of spring
When you kissed me and told me
That we were just friends.

How can I take it?
How can I make it?
I wanted much more from the start.
Maybe in time, if I’m patient, you’ll see
The feelings down deep in my heart.

Tasting your honey,
Lost in your wine,
Dreaming of how life should be.
Tulips in springtime,
Your two lips on mine.
Tulips, your two lips, and sweet memory.

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Conclusion

I’ve come to the conclusion that
The end is really not the end,
That life in its profusion
Simply doubles up and back again.
It causes some confusion when
One casts such theories on the wind.
But who’s to say and
Who is to deny.

It makes me happy to believe that
There is something more,
Makes it easier to grieve for
Those who’ve gone before,
To know that when it’s time to leave
To seek a distant shore
There’ll be no earthly need
For me to cry.

I’ll meet you in another place,
Greet your shining, smiling face.
Lost through doubt,
Redeemed by grace,
No thought to question why.

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Enigma

You are the riddle,
         The hidden enigma,
                 Baffling logic at every hand.
Strafing the surface of
         Broad ambiguity,
                 Asking for tunes meant to stump the band.

Vaguely perplexing,
         This minion of madness
                 Hailing and howling its song to the stars.
Building your case in
         The court of emotion.
                 Praying for time to heal all of the scars.

You never wavered.
         You never faltered.
                 You never begged for a second chance.
Always a champion,
         Always a lover,
                 First to the footlights,
                          Ready to dance.

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Whimsy

Taking off on flights of fancy
To an unknown destination,
Curious to know no reason,
Seeking extraordinary.

Break the plane of barren logic
Beyond Oz and Munchkin land to
Sleep the night in poppy fields
Guarded by a band of fairies.

Beat the drum and dance the dance
To tunes that no one else can hear.
Sing your own capriccio
Regardless of the consequence.

Be they quaint,
Be they odd,
Be they loud and fanciful
No one can predict the words that
Raise a cry for common sense.

And who would take a heart to task
When whimsy is the only rule?
Better just to sit and watch
The ravings of a mortal fool.

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Vindictive

It wasn’t enough to end it, now was it? 
You had to get in that last little bite,
Just one more sting, one last gouging punch,
Amend and append your vindictive charade.

Could have just walked away, got away clean,
Made a fresh start without causing a fuss.
But stroking your ego was far too important for
You to sit idle and watch the parade.

Life has a way of evening out all the
Weights and measures, to level the scales.
Patience is hard but worth the reward.
When all is over, it’s well worth the trade.

There is a consequence for every action…
Levies to pay for choices made.

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Pandora

Take me back to innocent times,
Let me be that naive child
Whose only fault was a deadly case
Of willful curiosity.

Sweet surrender filled my days
And there was honey in the wind
To satisfy my deepest urge,
To underscore civility.

Long before Pandora’s tryst,
Before the beast of chaos was
Unleashed on unsuspecting souls
There was an uneven peace.

But when the lid was opened
And the demons were set free
There was not a single force
To govern their release.

And we are left to face the test,
To cage the wily fox,
To wrangle with the consequence
And close Pandora’s box.

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Furious

My God! What on earth were you thinking?
Have you finally lost your unmoving mind?
What kind of devil possesses a soul
To make it react so unfeeling, unkind?

Slashing and sloshing through every emotion
You conjured a storm of tsunami proportion,
Bypassing logic and stymied to reason
You skewed the truth into miles of distortion.

How can you possibly live with yourself
Without making some sort of open admission?
Conscience in atrophy,
Major catastrophe,
All sense of decency into remission.

This is the last, the lowest transgression.
I can’t stand by watching you carry on.
You’re not the you that I knew way back when.
Sadly…
            It’s over…
                             I’m gone.

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Margarita

Saucy, sexy, salty blend of
Emerald magic,
Make me sing.
Lend your music to my muse
Before my mind melts into mush.

You were always there for me
In days of triumph,
Nights of woe. When 
Melancholy swept my spirit
You were there to ease the crush.

Now this tired body cannot
Take the journey deep into
The endless night,
Your joyful jaunt is
Just a dream of yesterday.

Still you tempt me with your wiles,
Just a taste for old time sake;
Enough to jog the memory
And chase all cares away.

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Innocent

Sitting inside this prison cell,
No walls, no bars, no locks or chains,
No prison guards to walk the halls,
No other inmates to share my grief.

Bound and confused by some unwritten code
That gives you the right to lay judgment on me,
To leave me in torment of unending measure
Willing to grovel for one simple glance.

You turn no ear, offer no reason
Though it appears I have done nothing wrong.
And while I am gathering my resolution, you
Simply fold your tent and walk away.

Where is the justice in your court of passion?
Show me the weight that will balance the scale.
You are the jury, judge and prosecutor with
No breath allowed from my advocate.

Tell me what I need to do for your favor.
Retrace the answers to questions unasked.
I am no more than an innocent fool
Guilty of loving you…
                                     Nothing more.

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Gargantuan

Big, large, massive, huge, 
Enormous, super-size,
Far too much envisioning  
For one sweep of the eyes,
More than stretched imaginings
For one who seeks the prize,
The Holy Grail,
The grand gargantuan.

Held at birth, but never since;
The burden far too great.
Height and girth expanding,
White rabbit running late.
Hyper drive extended
Ever running toward her fate.
No one dares deter gargantuan.

Bolster her foundation so
Her shelter may endure.
Nurture her through illness.
Help her find a cure.
Many seek,
Many find her heart so kind and pure,
This noble one,
This grand gargantuan.

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Diatribe

Where in the heck has decency gone?
Who the devil do you think you are?
See, I could have said hell
Or even the f-word to show my displeasure,
Express my case.
But I choose demeanor
Instead of demeaning the question
With rhetoric’s unsavory flavor.

Stand on my soap box and
Rant until dawn, til
The silent Gestapo comes,
Hauls me away,
Places my poor shackled bones
In their prison
Muting my diatribe to hungry ears.

But I won’t be silenced.
My song will continue to
Ring past the walls of
This Gulag existence.
And you. Sir, should tremble
At your day of reckoning,
The day that the pendulum
Finds its way home.

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Eloquence

Sit me down near the foot of the stage
So that I won’t miss a single syllable
Baked and awash in such dulcimer tones
That my ears are golden to know their favor.

Feed me words that trill as they thrill me,
Fill me with gushes of bubbly froth.
Take me away to the hills of Nirvana 

Where sweet fruit and honey will be mine to savor.

Lift up the room. Bring it up past the summit.
Ride on the clouds til the air becomes thin
And the crowd becomes giddy with anticipation,
Hoping beyond hope the ride will not end.

Teach me your secret. Take me to task.
Where can I learn what you wear as a gift?
Eloquence finds you, even defines you
Riding the crest of a vanishing wind.

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Precipice

Standing on the edge looking down…
Down.
Down from this lonely ledge to the ground
And around…
Aware of every sight, every sound to abound,
Waiting for the anger to subside.

Step from out of nowhere to the fire…
Fire.
Heap the heavy logs high upon the pyre
Kindling the beast of hard desire in the mire
Where the cradles of calamity collide.

Don’t push… for I will surely fall…
Fall…
Fall to clinched jaws that are prone to gnash and gnaw.
Flashed by danger, haunted, shocked with awe,
Never knowing why I am to blame.

Mercy. Please have mercy on my soul…
Soul.
Set your price and let me pay the toll.
Do not toss my weary bones into your dark dank hole.
I am not, should not be your final aim.

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Canyon

Who lives in this canyon
So dark and deep
Where ancient waters carved
Fortress walls?
It seems to cultivate
Gardens of strangers,
Vagabond players who camp,
Then move on.

I used to know every soul
In this valley
From high on her ridges to
Way round the bend.
But time takes its toll
As we roll ever forward,
Leaves only memories
To build upon.

There will be moments,
Whether here or hereafter
To recount the reckoning,
Review the views.
Patiently waiting alone
In this canyon,
No one to talk to…
Nothing to lose.

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Epilogue

When my epilogue is written
May the words come trippingly
From silver tongue and ruby throat
To drench the roses with their honey.

Gather all my fateful friends,
My poor relations, seldom seen,
Telling tales from memory,
Both bittersweet and funny.

I’ll not be around to hear the
Sweet melodic undertones, the
Ticking, clicking metronomes
That chant my eulogy.

Rather I’ll be on my way to
Better days and better ways,
To claim my spot at Heaven’s gate
Where spirits all run free.

And I’ll see you again someday
Far beyond that final hill
Where we will spend our fond forever
In a land where time stands still.

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Belligerent

Primed and garbed in restless armor,
Always ready for a fight,
Self-assured and double-strong,
Never wrong,
Forever right.

Not a soul can match your fervor.
No shield can fend your attack.
Breach the line to capture glory.
No regrets,
No looking back.

Won’t take crap from anybody.
Far more prone to dole it out
With a shout of bold pronouncement
Leaving not the slightest doubt.

Be the beast.
Be the hero.
Step into the victor’s zone.
Carry all the consequences.
They are yours…
Yours alone.

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Fandango

What is this fancy little dance we’re doing?
Speed up. No! Slow down.
Now speed up again.
Elfishly playing emotional ping pong
Like two gangly teenagers caught in a game.

I feel like I should be passing notes in
Homeroom, subtle hints dressed in disguise,
Or having a friend tell a friend tell a friend
Til I hear that you told someone
You feel the same.

We should just silence this foolish fandango,
Accept confrontation, stand face to face.
We’re wasting time dancing round in a circle,
Time we could better spend lost in embrace.

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Prudence

Would it be prudent to
Walk away silently?
Should I back down
Without passion or heat?
Could there be consequence
Bent on inaction?
What good would become of
A velvet retreat?

I wasn’t wrong!
Well, maybe a little.
I was the victim!
But you were hurt, too.
You were the stubborn one!
I only wanted for you
To see my way.
Well, that’s nothing new.

Rethink the middle.
Retrace the path.
Prudence is practical.
You do the math.

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Liquidity

She moves downhill,
Begs no favor,
Filling cracks and vast depressions 

Along the way to overflowing,

Always growing, always knowing,
Lending, giving, smothering.
Being absorbed by Mother Earth
Who only borrows for a while
Then gladly gives her back.

Nothing lives without her kindness.
Flora, fauna, man and beast
Must bow to her intrepid wisdom,
Cling to every precious drop.

And what are we without her wealth?
Only dust blown by the wind
To every corner, every niche,
Lonely souls without a shape.

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Facilitator

Make it happen, Peter Pan.
Sprinkle us with Pixie dust so
We can fly to Neverland
To dance and be forever young.

Fairy God mom, waive your wand.
Dress your favorite for the ball.
Make her magic dream come true
Til midnight’s chime at last has rung.

Teach me, Merlin. Make me king.
Help me raise this sword from stone.
Give me wisdom, confidence
That I may rule with measured hand.

Walk with me on hallowed soil where 

Once a carpenter was slain

To give us hope, to give us peace,
To spread His gospel through the land.

We are vessels, every one,
Facilitators by degree,
Reaching out and letting go
To set our listless spirits free.

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Carousel

Up and down, around the magic circle
Into wonderland,
Flying, floating fantasies of
Fearless fairies flying high.
Wait for no one,
Casting eyes and casting fate
To gentle winds,
Dancing to a lively muse
Who knows no lullaby.

Newly indestructible,
Mounted on a faithful steed,
Armored in imagination,
Sally forth with shield and sword.
Slaying dragons, tilting windmills,
Rescuing the maiden fair,
Seeking justice in the end
To be its own reward.

There are cares and grave concerns
That must be brought to bear,
But only when the ride is done
Will I be forced to care.

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Nickelodeon

You were truly before my time,
But that doesn’t make it any less meaningful.
Nickelodeon, play for the piper,
Give them a tune as they wait for the band.
This symbol of joy placed a
Smile on the face, a
Dance in the step, a
Song in the heart of all who
Were lucky enough to have known
The nameless enchantment
Unique to her name.

I grew up later, knowing her grandchild.
Three for a quarter and
Hungry for more.
Playing the records I’d heard on the radio,
Now entirely at my command.
Driving the older crowd
Into submission,
Wond’ring what mock aberration was next.
Dancing a jig if it suited my purpose.
No false apology,
No sense of shame.

Nickelodeon, thanks for your progeny.
Who knows what wonders will shadow your fame?

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Shadows

Shadow Stalker, cold and gray,
Bend my eyes to find your shape 

Hiding from the naked light,

Secrets kept beneath your cape.

Would you steal my sanity? 

Leave me here to quake and quell?

Lead me down a narrow path
Into the darkest pits of Hell?

Such a fine and fragile line
Separates you from the light.
Desperate to be known to none,
Always running from a fight.

Play the reuse of your deception
While your stealth divines my fate.
Help me find your dark agenda
Before it is forever late.

Patience serves the waiting throngs
And hope is never all or none. 

For every place a shadow falls

Somewhere there must be sun.

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Placebo

What was meant to be a cure
For a broken heart turned out to be
Little more than a sugar pill,
Blind faith taken for a ride.

Turns out naught was as it seemed
In your tawdry token web
Ringed with phantoms of obsession
Talking trash, singing hope.

And I believed you.
Bad mistake.
Yours was not a random cure.
Taunting me with your placebo
As the knife turned in your hand.

Now I see you in the light
And the question begs to ask.
Can a heart that’s broken twice
Find the strength to carry on?

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