Uncle Billy’s been hauled off to jail.
Sheriff said he hadn’t paid support
For almost half a year.
Brace yourself. There’s more.
Cousin Tommy turned seven today,
Precious little wart.
They caught him getting drunk off beer.
Brace yourself. There’s more.
Sister Sally’s getting married.
Such a grand surprise.
They said she’s in the family way
Like her sister was before.
She’s marrying that biker dude,
Everybody’s prize.
He’s going to take her far away.
Brace yourself. There’s more.
Poppa fell and broke his leg.
Can’t work for seven weeks.
We could likely starve by then
Since we’re already poor.
Momma’s sick and took to bed
So we are on our own.
Cupboard’s bare and we don’t care.
Brace yourself….
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